Being married to an inmate comes with a special set of challenges as far as getting outsiders to understand. There are some that give me “the look” as soon as I mention Jeremy is in prison and this look is both hurtful and annoying to me. For one, I`ve decided to let someone in on a little bit more of my life, hoping they will understand, that they will at least welcome me with open arms and let me tell my story and they should feel lucky. There have been people who, initially, will look at me like I`m a crazy person, like I obviously cannot function normally. How dare I marry an inmate? How dare I? Don`t I know what inmates are made up of? Everything disgusting and vile. It’s funny what a single look can tell you, but some of these people have come around, getting to know my husband through me and have come to ask about him regularly, and even like him. Those people had a 50/50 chance of staying in my life and to those who have stayed, who have endured, who have laughed and cried with me: I thank you for putting aside your judgement and really giving me and my love a chance to find a positive place in your hearts and thoughts.
Not everything goes over smoothly, though, and there will always be people who just cannot accept my marriage, my life, my love. Who irritates me most is the people who have no idea, who judge from afar, from their perfect little lives, and decide that I am wrong. They do a little research, decided everything they’ve read is enough to shut me out of their lives, to trust in some “truth” at first glance, and to ultimately condemn me for standing by someone who is so very much like anyone else walking the streets should they ever get to know him. I`m not going to lie: this type of blind judgement infuriates me and breaks my heart. I am forever grateful to the people who asked about my husband, who messaged me saying they were “shocked” or that they wanted to know more, instead of just wiping me out of their lives without having any idea of what I’m about, what my life is about. Good riddance? Indeed.